Wasnt worth to be...

There are times when you treat people well doesnt mean he/she will treat you good as well. In fact, they might be stabbing you. This is how and when I shall learn to defend myself..or perhaps to protect myself... Too tired to figure it out anymore...watever........

Miserable day....

There are times when we are happy but yet there are times too when we are miserable...
in our life sometimes decision has to be made in order to determine your future steps...today i was kinda down but yet no one to turn to at the point of moment...few things happened which doesnt seem to favour me...anyway, i supposed all people will have at least a moment of that in their life...people close to you sometimes also didnt really what you expect...finally i really agree with my sis that family members is the most i can turn to. A simple call to my mum really sooth me alot rather than other....almost burst into tears when talking to my mum...miss her alot. Hoping for a good brand new day...

Sorry For a Friend...

Yesterday late night (18/03/2009), I had a serious chat with a friend thru msn. The talk was almost burst out...ya can feel the heat as well...With my intention to help him but turn out the other way...Very sorry for this friend but it seem I was misunderstand by him in certain circumstances...But maybe is my problem also for doing good for him but was miscommunicated as though im a kind of person who like to 'jaga tepi kain orang'...I felt what he mentioned that night.Anyway, I darent to continue further telling and explain to him the things I should have, as I know this will only worsen the situation and maybe no more friendship between us. Even if we do, the close friendship bond that we used to have isnt there anymore...Thats the situation i dont want to happen...Thus, I have to keep it myself.I think I should have improve myself from time to time....My IQ and EQ* especially...I shouldnt put this friend in such a dilemma and problem although i wanted to help him...becoz finally he voiced out that he's kinda tired with that situation...I felt very sorry for him...but One thing I wanted him to know is I have no problem or perhaps arguement with anyone in my life...this is not an exception aswell. As the horoscope said..im a kind of helpful and loyal to friendship libran..lolx. Anyway, I have no place to utter but in my very own blog...Sorry again my friend, i dun mean to put you in such situation as you thought of.

May god bless this friend of mine with joy and peace, so do i....

Life

Everyday life seems to be getting tougher and tougher for me...Thorns are growing out and flanked the path of mine...I really dunno when will this end and when i would able to standing still...Im really tired and exhausted. Beleaguered by problems which I myself also dunno whether could be shared have added my burden...I wish I can be a child again, no need to worry about all these but I know this wouldnt happen unless i can reverse and control the time...Im not avoiding problems but just that having some difficulties though...Some people said blogging can help but does it really help? I cant give a certain answer to myself though..Talk to close friend/s?...I hope so...Anyway, I believe every human being will go through this path just that different in the sense of timing....


My life just in miserable now...

"Are You There?"

Sometimes, I feel wanna talk to a friend but just that he's not around...Sometimes wanna share problems just that he's busy...Sometimes feel unhappy thought to go out with but he doesnt feel like wanna accompany...Sometimes feel abit lonely and thought to go out but ignorance was the response...Thats sometimes happened but wishing not to happen to me in the future. I wont blamed anyone or angry with coz thats part of our friendship world. "Friend in need is a friend indeed" sometimes doesnt really applies. What do you think?If you find this friend no longer by your side accompany and helping you up, is ok...dont be depressed. At least you have the clear answer for yourself....This world sometimes is really realistic in certain things.Curb it yourself Kenny Dang!
...Anyway, thank you for being my friend!I would alwis appreciate you, my friend...

Nice song to listen...Like the rhythm...Play it!

15th Day of CNY 2009

Today is the last day of CNY in lunar calendar...As for the last celebration, I went to my senior house for a gathering with my colleagues as I have cancelled few gatherings with them before this...Sounds bad but I was invited last minute though.That's why I wasn't prepare...haha. Part of them seem busy enjoying the photos that my senior taken during her holidays in overseas...She seem visited alot of places over the world...At her young age, she seem kinda rich ...maybe her parents is rich or she herself rich...Anyway, very envy her though...And i raised a question to myself...'When can I travel like her or even more than her?' rather than asking 'Why I cant travel like her?'...and from this night onwards, I promised to myself that I will work smarter and harder in the coming days to gain my wealth in future., so that the success that I achieved can bring me travel around the world with my parents and my future wife....sounds dreaming but what I really believe is that if u dare to dream u will achieve one day...Really hope the day will come very soon... :)

Which Category of Friends You Are In?

How do you define good friend? true friend? best friends?perhaps real friends?...In my world I have alot of friends but which category they falls in? Im still in doubt. In my everyday life, working time or social time same people I met but are they really true to you? or just acting only...Somehow sometimes Im abit scare living in this world...everything is unexpected especially human. Today they can be your close friends but tomorrow they maybe your foe...
Maybe I think too much as one of my friend said. But somehow sometimes environment that actually make you thought of that rather than you yourself sit down and stir up the thought...Infact sometimes when you treat a friend good, the return wouldnt be as what you expected...Sometime they may sacrifice you as well.Thats the saddest part...Thats what I experienced too...What do you think?Do you have the same thought?

CNY 2009...My Family...

This year CNY celebration seem to be different for me. I felt I'm even closer to my family than ever before though I'm away from home for few years...Having to work in Malacca GH for my government service, I hardly go back to my hometown...once a month? two months once etc...yet our relationship din loosen...That's what every family member hope for.During this year of celebration, I bought my mum and sis's some gems..is blue sapphire and they really really like it till burst to tears... Haha ...maybe too touch by my gift. Anyway, I luv my family very much and I'm glad to be born in this family. Nothing much better than family members...

Road of My Life

The road ahead me seem to have lotsa obstacles for me to go through...I wish it is a simple path to walk but nothing is simple if u want to have a good ending...But what i believe is hardwork alwiz pay off. With this saying...Im breathing with a burning desire and never give up easily although friends around me seem to pull me down all the time and everytime...I promise to myself and my family, that one day I would bring home success to make them proud...and I believe I can do it.What is needed is effort and really hoping someone will give me encouragement and support for me to walk this path so that I will reach the end of the path to enter the world of success. The success that I wanted to...

World Laaaargest Swimming Pool!

If you like doing laps in the swimming pool, you might want to stock up on the energy drinks before diving in to this one.

It is more than 1,000 yards long, covers 20 acres, had a 115ft deep end and holds 66 million gallons of water..

Yesterday the Guinness Book of Records named the vast pool beside the sea in Chile as the biggest in the world.

But if you fancy splashing out on one of your own - and you have the space to accommodate it - then beware: This one took five years to build, cost nearly 1billion and the annual maintenance bill will be 2million.

The man-made saltwater lagoon has been attracting huge crowds to the San Alfonso del Mar resort at Algarrobo, on Chile 's southern coast, since it opened last month.

Its turquoise waters are so crystal clear that you can see the bottom even in the deep end.

It dwarfs the world's second biggest pool, the Orthlieb - nicknamed the Big Splash - in Morocco , which is a mere 150 yards long and 100 yards wide. An Olympicsize pool measures some 50 yards by 25 yards.

Chile's monster pool uses a computer- controlled suction and filtration system to keep fresh seawater in permanent circulation, drawing it in from the ocean at one end and pumping it out at the other.

The sun warms the water to 26c, nine degrees warmer than the adjoining sea.

Chilean biochemist Fernando Fischmann, whose Crystal Lagoons Corporation designed the pool, said advanced engineering meant his company could build 'an impressive artificial paradise' even in inhospitable areas.

'As long as we have access to unlimited seawater, we can make it work, and it causes no damage to the ocean.'

Kinda Frustrated Sometimes...

Sometimes feel kinda frustrated when you care for a friend but in return they didnt show any appreciation especially when you treat them as your close friends...thats what happening in our realistic world perhaps 'my realistic world'. Advice given but yet drained away to the sewage.In fact, sometimes they said you have an attitude problem (kinda hurt indeed).Sighhh...Anyway, is up to them to think bout themselves already.No doubt they are mature enough to make their decision.Im not their guardian, im not their advisor, but just a friend who concern...thats the best thing I can do.What else to expect, my friend.

Two Of Us For Eternity

Nice Thai Lakorn...A story about how life and love go hand-in-hand, and how precious they both are. However, the obstacles that they faced lead them to the most tragic, but beautiful ending ever. Worth to watch...PLAY THE MV I UPLOADED!Nowadays, watch Thai Drama as well...haha. I guess not much of my friends watch them.

Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

We cant be out on the edge every second of every day. Everybody needs times to rest and become rejuvenated. However, if we stay in our comfort zones, we will never achieve anything of value. Our dreams lie out beyond the horizon. And just as ships were not built to stay in the harbour, we were not made to stay where it is safe. People are created to be resilient and resourceful.Here are some good and bad things i wish to share about the the comfort zone:

1: In the comfort zone, most of the game is played.Just as most of a football game is played in the middle of the field-between the twenty yard lines- most of the game of life is played in the comfort zone. Its the place you must start before you try to make it to the end zone.

2: In the comfort zone, people often lose interest. What happen to people when nothing ever changes and they are never challenged? They get bored. Deep down, most people desire adventure.But they will never experience it if they are unwilling to get out of their recliners.

3: In the comfort zone, mistakes are not as costly. One of the good things about comfort zone is that the consequences of mistakes are not as dire. As you start to work toward your dreams, false starts and fumbles wont't stop you permanently.

4: In the comfort zone, opposition is not well focused. Another positive aspect of the comfort zone is that people are often relaxed there. That gives you an opportunity to get going. Only as you leave the comfort zone will the competition pick up.

5: In the comfort zone, victory cannot be achieved. If you are in the comfort zone and want to win, you must do what does not feel natural. You cannot stay comfortable and achieve victory. There is no guarantee that you will achieve it if you leave your comfort zone. But if you never leave your comfort zone, you are guaranteed not to achieve it..

Trust me!!

Make Yourself Different...

We ought not to be fearful to try new things simply because we're not masters of those new things already. If we will simply get out and try, we can do amazing things that are simply through the process of our personal development."

Change Begins with Choice

Any day we wish; we can discipline ourselves to change it all. Any day we wish; we can open the book that will open out mind to new knowledge. Any day we wish; we can start a new activity. Any day we wish; we can start the process of life change. We can do it immediately, or next week, or next month, or next year.

We can also do nothing. we can pretend rather than perform. And if the idea of having to change ourselves makes us uncomfortable, we can remain as we are. We can choose rest over labor, entertainment over education, delusion over truth, and doubt over confidence. The choices are ours to make. But while we curse the effect, we continue to nourish the cause. As Shakespeare uniquely observed, "The fault is not in the stars, but in ourselves.' We created our circumstances by our past choices. We have both the ability and responsibility to make better choices beginning today. Those who are in search of the good life do not need more answers or more time to think things over to reach a better conclusions. They need the truth. They need the whole truth. And they need nothing but the truth.

We cannot allow our errors in judgement, repeated everyday, to lead us down the wrong path. We must keep coming back to those basics that make the biggest difference in how our life works out. And then we must make the very choices that will bring life, happiness and joy into our lives.

And if I may be so bold to offer my last piece of advice for someone seeking and needing to make changes in their life- If you don't like how things are, change it! You are not a tree. You have the ability to totally transform every area in your life- and it all begins with your very own power of choice.

Time really flies...

It has been almost a year since I last wrote in this blog. New PRPs has become FRPs now... but nothing seen to be different to me in term of work coz no new FRP will be entering my Oncology Unit...Is ok, I still can handle it after so long of nourish in this field.

Steps to my future career...have I make a move?

This week was my first week as a FRP (Fully Registered Pharmacist). I was retained in the same hospital (Hospital Melaka) as an oncology pharmacist...Thats one of the unit I was specially trained under the supervision of my previous preceptor, Ms Mak. She was one of the expert I ever met in this hospital. but unfortunately she left for Singapore last month. Pay in Singapore is much higher than here...was that one of her reason?Im not sure...perhaps.

Handling a CDR unit isnt that simple nor difficult. Sounds confusing...haha. There will be times you have to make up your decision when reconstituting or settling some problem by yourself. Lately, the 'Clean Room" in this unit goes haywire. Hepa filter got leakage and the room temperature isnt stable. Imagine I went into the room to reconstitute for 4 hours continuously with the temperature of 24.9 degree celcius wearing 3 layer of clothes (shirt, jump suit, isolation gown, double layer of mask, gloves). Oh man... I sweat alot...I wonder is it still sterile or not. Discomfort was my companion all the time until I finish all the 16 patients on that day. Phew...really an experience.

Later, I approached my chief pharmacist for a solution. At first the Pengarah doesnt want to subsidize for the repair but finally what I heard was that they agreed to take out Rm55,000 for the repair as well as maintenance. Hopefully, the room will be repaired soon. When you incharge of something, staff is an asset. Managing staffs in the unit really tackle your skills. However, most of the staffs really respect me and help me alot...so called 'beri muka'. Haha...really appreciate them.

As I'm still new to this department, lotsa things still waiting for me to learn and explore. Hopefully in this few years time, I would become well known for my expertise at least in this hospital...Haha. Nothing is impossible....Gambateh new Oncology Pharmacist!! You have made your first step to your future line...

Loneliness has been a friend of mine...

Today as usual, I woke up in the morning and had my breakfast alone in Bt Baru...this whole day I suddenly has a feeling of loneliness that I never felt before. Everyone seemed like away from from me. Kak Mazni, one of my best senior FRP left us this morning. My housemate, Shazly going to move out today, some of my prp colleagues waiting for official letter to transfer out.Sigh...my life suddenly like very empty and loneliness just like waiting out of my door. Maybe I'm still single...thats why I had that feeling. Everyone concern bout me. Infact some even try to be match maker hoping I will find a girlfriend very very soon.Haha...luv cant be forced but anyway I really appreciate their effort.

Next Monday,will be my special day, will be a brand new day for me as a FRP, but I yet to know which unit I will go. My KPF (chief pharmacist) still in considering which unit to put me in. He sounded like very hard to place me...maybe I'm problematic or perhaps too good. Haha...

Where am i suppose to go?

Today is my second last day as a PRP in Hospital Melaka...Sad or happy, i have both of it. Some of my colleagues are going to leave us very soon. They got transferred to other state, however that were their intention. Happy because im going to be a FRP but sad to say,i yet to know which unit im suppose to go. My KPF (chief pharmacist) is quite secretive. Till now he still din tell us.Sigh...c'mon, give me some days for preparation.

I'm hoping to get into Oncology Unit/ TPN Unit coz it would be an advantage for me for my future line in the market. Whatever now...hope tomorrow will get to know.

Being slack when dispensing...Is all my fault??

Today...as usual, outpatient pharmacy still the busiest unit in the whole pharmacy department. Crowded by patients and piles of prescriptions...we still screened and dispensed the whole day. Some patients till now still don't understand the word of 'wait ' and 'patient' yet they still termed as patient. Haha...but having the different meanings in fact.

As usual, I screened and dispensed like last week but due to my so called 'short term memory lost', something unpleasant happened. This afternoon after lunch hour, Miss Tai,one of our dispenser (a workaholic as well) walked around and asked everyone in outpatient to find out who dispensed patient with Acyclovir? Sounded no problem at first but later she said the patient took Acyclovir 5 tablets in one shot..Thats sounds worrying after I've checked with Drug Info Handbook...Should be 5 tablet taken with interval of hours in a day time and not in one shot!!!. I cant remember whether I'm the one who dispensed or what...And because of my memory problem...it seemed that I'm the one to be blamed...OMG....But what I remembered I didnt dispensed this morning. However, I have to take some responsibility as well cause I'm one the staff who incharged in the counter with others...But I really cant remember whether is my fault or what...Sigh...What a bad day...

*Is a norm for human being (certain people) that deny at first when he/she did something wrong....but later admitted it...right?...Never mind because nowadays PRP still the first to be targetted...(lowest status among all officers and shallowest in term of knowledge among dispensers)...Take this as a challenge in my working life...hehe (I guessed).

My Diving Trip

Last weekend, I went to east coast alone, heading for my ideal getaway place...the Perhentian Kecil island. Tiring and exhausted for working months and months without any holiday...I planned to go for a diving license...Yup...thats one of my dream since primary six. I took up an open water diver course which caused me around RM 1000...(thats the price in west Malaysia). Right after working hour around 5pm i went back to have my dinner and packed up my stuffs heading for bus terminal. The bus ticket I boarded was 8pm...I almost late that night because I need to settle my house rental with the owner as she was leaving for Singapore...So coincidence..phiu!!

My journey took me 9 hours to reach Jerteh, Terengganu. Not so bad cause I slept all the way...as usual right?after working for long hours...a good rest is necessary...Besides, one of the rules before diving is adequate rest.Thats what I did. When I reached Jerteh, I called the agent to pick me up and she drove me to the jetty. Her name was Mrs Shikin. She 's quite nice and friendly.

Being unspoiled island lie amidst exquisitely clear waters, Pulau Perhentian Kecil (Small Perhentian) aptly named after "henti"(stop) as fishermen from mainland Kelantan and Terengganu have, for centuries, stopped over at the island for a rest or to shelter during a major storm. Teluk Aur (also known as Coral Bay) was the place I'm heading. Although it is not as attractive as Long Beach, but it is not so crowded - yet. There are good corals for snorkelling in the bay and around the short beach behind the Rajawali Resort. Further more you can get a great view of the breathtaking Perhentian sunsets here.

The accommodation here not available for reservation, just for walk in basis. Thus, I only have my room that day...luckily not ended up sleeping in the classroom...Hehe. After unloaded my stuffs, I went to the dive center (Steffen Dive Center) to meet my instructor. >>>>>> My first dive buddy was Emma, an Australian girl around mid 20s. She's traveling around the world and Malaysia still wasn't her last stop. Guess what...she's gonna make her way to northern part...Thailand, Myanmar, Laos, Vietnam...etc. Thats still a long way.

During these 3 days trip, I managed to go for 5 dives...that was really funtastic and challenging. My first dive was a real challenge for me cause I cant equalize my pressure and ended up with sinus pain. My instructor kept on guiding me and finally I managed to do so underwater. My effort paid off when I saw my first favourite fish..guess what...the 'pufferfish'. That wasn't an ordinary size of pufferfish but a gigantic puffer...it was measured around 90-100 cm (almost a meter). Fu-yoh...I wonder what it look like when bloated up. Haha..but I daren't to trigger it. Perhaps other divers may have some interesting experience?
Continue...

First Time Blogger...

Well...well. Which alphabet key should I press first?? Haha...Thats normal for a first time blogger. Previously, I don't blog but just read a couple of my friends' blogs. Somehow out of sudden, i just felt wanna give myself a try. Anything attracted me to do so...perhaps.

Currently, Im working in Outpatient Pharmacy department, Malacca General Hospital. Life here is quite ok yet not much excitement compared to my 4 years life in KL (when I was studying at UKM that time).Time really flies and I have been separated from some of my friends more than 6 months. I'm doubt whether they still remember me or not...Maybe...maybe not. Some really never contact at all...but some still keep in touch especially those from Ipoh...I wonder how are the rest doing?